I talk on skype with my son.

Tr:  Ani medaberet ba'skype im ha ben sheli.  (I wish).

Our Rental Car

Yesterday was a rainy day, so Husbandman and I traveled south to Tel Aviv.  We went to 2 museums.  We accidentally found this cool lunch place called Puaa.  It was sunny during lunch so we sat outside.  Really pleasant.  There were some smokers outside though, so that was a drawback.

Public Service Announcement Time, Peeps:  Smokers, please stop smoking.  You're wrecking stuff for others.  I hope Host Country soon gets to passing laws that will make your lives miserable like the laws for our smokers back in the States.  Sorry, but it's for your own good, smokers.  

I can go now.

Tr:  Ani yekhola lalekhet akhshav.

I'm going to hand out some free advice that a few bloggers need to know.  You know who you are.  Listen up, this is going to change your lives.  I'm discovering that some of you aren't blogging because you're caring too much about creating quality blog posts. (Not you, Pronto). For most of you, perfectionism is holding you back and keeping your readers out in the cold, which is a little frustrating.  Here are some tips for getting back into the blogging groove.

First off, phone it in.  Set a timer for one minute and write the first sentence that comes into your head. Treat your blog as you would a tweet. Throw perfectionism in the trash. Try to write the worst blog entries you can.  That's what I do and it's working out fine.

How hard is it to open up the computer and write down a random thought or two on your blog? These thoughts don't even have to be connected to reality. Here.  I'll show you.

• I used to be an Olympic skier, but I only medaled once and it was a bronze, so I don't like to tell people about it.
• I saw Robo Cop last night.  Really good.  If you want to see it, you should.
• The Koreans have kind of an attractive flag. 
• Husbandman has turned into quite the bookworm this year.  I'm a wee bit annoyed with his constant reading and holier than thou literacy attitude.

So that took about 4 minutes and any reader would be happy to click on your blog and see any one of these interesting ideas, as opposed to wasting their time clicking on your blog to find zip written there yet again. Not trying to pressure anyone, just stating facts.  Let's go people.

We never dance polka.

Tr:  Anakhnu af-pa'am lo rokdim polka.

Hey ho, Hi ho and how are you doing? It's time for Thursday Creativity Share.  Welcome! 

I just learned about these crazy creations called gathas, simple little poems you recite along with the rhythm of your breathing.  Gathas can help you with staying mindful.  Example:

Before starting the car
I know where I am going.
The car and I are one,
if the car goes fast, I go fast.

Nice, right?  There are gathas for brushing your teeth, washing the dishes, waking up.  Here's a gatha I wrote to recite when I start worrying because I don't know what my job will be next year. 

I am 53 years old.
I have no job.
My fate is in others' hands.
Nothing can be done. 

And that's Thursday Creativity Share.  It's a wrap. See you next week with more creative stuff you need to know about.

There's an elephant in the zoo.

Tr:  Yesh pil be'gan khayiot.

I took a day off in order to wallow in self pity, for my own stupid reasons.

By 5pm, the wallowing was getting old so I became vertical and made a cup of tea.  My mom always said that her mom always said that a cup of tea solves everything.  I googled to find out more about the veracity of my grandmother's maxim and come to find out her words about the power of tea are all over the internets.  Way to go, Nana.  Your legacy lives on.

Need to know portion of the blog entry: Most of the world's tea is grown in my home state, Indiana. That's why we're known as the problem solving state.

One other thing you need to know about tea is that when you say "oolong" you're supposed to pronounce it "woolong."

Where Are the Olympics?

Eifo ha Olympics?

Swimming in February?  Weird and wonderful for me, but negatively impacting my Olympics viewing.

If you're thinking about moving to another country during an Olympics year, you need to know that some other countries (I'm talking to you, Host Country), aren't super crazy obsessed when it comes to the Olympics.  Depending on where you live you might not be able find television coverage of the Olympics no matter how much time you spend with that remote in your hand.  I understand that Host Country only has 5 athletes in these winter games but couldn't we be following their every move at the games and learning every intimate detail about their personal lives via short informational films?  I guess someone has a different idea about what "need to know" means when it comes to the Olympics over here in host country. Host Country, you know I love you, but let's kick it into gear with the games.

Update:  It has come to my attention (thanks, College Chum) that the Olympics is on TV right now. Channel 20.  So disregard above comments.  I don't feel like writing a whole new blog entry at this point because I'm busy watching the Olympics.

How are you all today?

Tr: Ma shlomkhem hayom?

Huddle up peeps, it's time for the Monday Writing Report (MWR).  Let's stop the folderol and get down to brass tacks. Frankly, not a lot to report.  I've outlined the intro and the first 3 chapters of the proposal and today was my day to tackle chapter 4.  I'm sorry to tell you that it simply didn't happen.  I tried and I failed. That's just how this stuff goes sometimes.  I'll try again tomorrow. Yes, of course I'm annoyed, but that's neither here nor there. I've got to take responsibility for this epic fail and look forward.

Husbandman and I finished Season 1 of Game of Thrones last night.  Game of Thrones is one oddball show.  I could do without the decapitations and tongue removals to tell you the honest truth. And the deaths by burning. But mostly we're enjoying it.

What are you doing?

Tr:  Ma ata ose?

I was all set up to get some work done today when our wonderful landwoman came by at ten a.m. and asked if I wanted to see Nebraska with her. My horoscope is all about making decisions with my heart rather than my head, so quick as a wink I replied in the affirmative. The movie was quite good and if you want to see it you definitely should.  It had some really sweet moments.

All afternoon, I kept thinking about how good it felt to change my plans. As June Squibb says, "Rules are meant to be broken."  I'm officially obsessed with June Squibb right now. I think everyone needs to know that June Squibb should win the academy award for her supporting actress role in Nebraska.  Not only is June Squibb a great actress, she has the greatest name in the universe. I wish I could be named June Squibb.

Good morning, Our Niece.

Tr:  Boker tov, akhyahnit shelanu.

Giant Jelly

Our sababa niece is here. So pleasant to have a visitor.

After a stroll on the beach, and a fab dinner at Giraffe, we saw Dallas Buyer's Club last night.  It's hard for me to see movies about people with AIDS but this one is nominated for the Oscar and you know I will see all 10 before Oscar night. I didn't know about the buyers clubs that helped people buy drugs that hadn't been FDA approved.  It's a good movie which you should see if you want, but the bodies of the actors freaked me out.  You need to know that it's not a good idea to lose so much weight that your bones are sticking through your skin.  Try not to do that for any reason. I'm begging you.

Off to the Hula!

I will need help.

Tr:  Eheye tsarikh ezra.

It's time for Thursday Creativity Share.  Tra la la LA!  This is what I've come up with.

First off, Husbandman and I are watching Seinfeld's series called Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee.  Our favorite episode so far is with Brian Regan.  I never heard of Brian Regan before, but now he's one of my best friends. The premise of this show is a good one, but where are the women comedians, Jer?

Nextly,  there's a new exhibit at the National Portrait Gallery called American Cool, with portraits of the 100 coolest Americans.  The curators used 4 points to determine coolitude, which I will now share with you via a bulleted list:

1. Original work with distinctive style
2. Rebelliousness, or transgressiveness
3. Icon status
4. Cultural Legacy

You only need to have 3 of the 4 to be in the exhibit, and I've decided I have 1, 2, and 4 and am, thusly, cool.  

And last but not least, there is a problem with a creative installation by Tony Matelli over at Wellesley College. Some of the peeps don't like Matelli's sculpture, called Sleepwalker.  I think it's okay, so it stays, Wellesley.    

It's a wrap.  Thursday Creativity Share.  

I need a large latte now.

Tr:  Ani tsrikha latte gadol akhshuv.

Great coffee shop writing day.  I even had time to write a one sentence story which you can read below:

"This day's going to be weird," said Sierra as she walked to Starbucks carrying the capuchin monkey she had just bought for ten bucks from the young woman on the corner. 

The need to know part of this story is this:  Capuchins don't make good pets.  Don't buy exotic animals if at all possible. 

Bad but not terrible

Bruges

Tr:  Rah, aval lo norah.

Today my mood lightened up considerably.  I'm back in the swing. So, long story short---no need to avoid vacations.  You just need to know that it takes awhile to get back into the work groove after a vacation.  Don't panic and remember to set the timer for short intervals.

Here's another thing you need to know.  We have a dear friend by the name of Sam Quinones who is a journalist and an author and he was on PBS NEWSHOUR yesterday talking about heroin and prescription drug abuse.  These things are horrible, so please avoid both, if you can.  Sam is brilliant on the show and his new book on the topic should be out by the end of 2014 I think.  Husbandman and I are extremely proud of our pal Sam.  #OnANeedtoKnowBasisBloggingChallenge readers, you need to know him as well, if you don't already know him.